Posts Tagged ‘and other such establishments’

You can’t tell me you two didn’t have fun, part one.

My friend today was talking to me about how much more expensive travel has gone up. Which reminded me of the time my sister and I went on our first real vacation. We went on the whole trip for less than 100 dollars a person, including gas. We were broke and had no money, but we did it. Although we didn’t eat much, we stayed on course and we got a really big adventure worth millions.

We headed out from our Tn home and started driving. Several hours later we got to Daytona, Fl. I had always wanted to go to the beach, so I was really excited. Now I have to interrupt my story, and I know that I just got started… My mom will say that she took us to the beach once before. This I foggily remember. I remember traveling in the car a long time and then us going by the beach and there was all this debris and we didn’t even get out. Then they had to change my brother’s diaper in the car (he was 2 and a half years younger than me so I could not have been that old). I also remember us going to a place that had the conch shells lined up. My dad told me that if you raised the shell to your ear that you would be able to hear the ocean. Well, I did and all I got was the ocean in my ear and down my shirt, and into my socks. It was full of water.  ugh… that kind of stuff always happened to me. So, I guess we went to the ocean, but there are no pictures (like always) and I had never been in salt water. So I would say that I have never been to the ocean. Back to the story.

I was super excited. I wanted to run and jump in the water but when we arrived it was dark. We did not have hotel reservations, because we thought that it would be easier to pick up some coupons at the state rest stops. I have to say my sister was a little crazy about having to stop at each one. And she was super excited that they gave out orange juice at Florida’s. (Georgia only gave out peanuts, and they weren’t even roasted.) The coupon that we found was for a nice hotel for $29.99 a night. Great! When we got there the guy at the desk was shocked and didn’t think that we could use it. The night before during the regular season they had charged $150.00 a night. But after he called his manager he gave us a room. We went up and collapsed. We were so tired.

The next morning I got up and ran to the window. The sun was coming up and it was wonderful. The beach looked so clean and neat. I put on my swimsuit all-the-while yelling at my sister to get up. She was a littlesurprised that I was up. I am not known for my early rising skills, now or ten years ago. She got up and we headed down. It was weird how when the waves returned to the ocean, the sand under your feet would move. It creep-ed me out and it took awhile to get used to that. I felt so strange yelping and picking my feet up in the surf.  No one else knew that this was my first time in the ocean, my sister was a little embarrassed. 

There was this moment that we saw some dolphins swimming in the waves and I thought that I could go swim to them. I gave out pretty soon, I was too chicken to go to far from the beach. When I got back to the shore I noticed that my sister was trying, casually, to get the attention of some other beach goers. She wanted them to see the dolphins but she didn’t want to be “weird” and just go up and tell them. (My mom has the way of going up to strangers and telling them all these awkward things, we try and not be like her in anyway possible. You would have to meet my mom to understand.) Looking back on it, we probably appeared to be crazy. After a good deal of fun in the sun, we had to get back to the room because we had to hit the road soon. Our trip was to continue on to Orlando and then Ft. Lauderdale for a cruise.

We went back to the room and my sister jumped into the shower while I called home to tell my crazy-but-mostly-in-the-fun-way Mom all about the fun. Then it was my turn. When I got out my sister was waiting for me by the door, the conversation went as follows:

Sister- Amy, did you do something to play a joke on me?

Me- No, what are you talking about?

Sister- This is not funny, I already called Jim and he didn’t do it.

Me- What, what are you talking about?

Sister- Go look at what fell out of my clothes when I went to pick them up.

I went with great caution, the tone in my sister’s voice was serious. She was creeped out. I looked beneath the table that the tv was on, where my sister had placed her luggage. She had a pile of neatly folded clothes on one side and then there IT was on the other…. It was a tiny blue sparkly man thong… EWWWWW. 

Me- EWWW, what are they? How did they get there?  ( I was not so calm. I had never even seen this kind of underwear, but it was plain to see what they were for…and immediately a picture of the guy that would wear them. Gross.)

Sister- I don’t know, I don’t know. ( Now she too was not so calm.)

What happened next, happened fast. We began having fits of laughing and screaming. Usually one of us was laughing at the other screaming. But all the while this was going on we were packing as fast as we could, while looking out for other surprises. At the same time, my sister’s husband called back and wanted to know what was going on and why she was asking about men’s underwear and my mom was calling trying to ask what was going on. We were so creeped out… It all came together when my sister remembered how wierd it was yesterday when we got into the room we noticed an envelope with a tip in it. We assumed that the maids just didn’t take it. I mean the rest of the room looked made up and clean! I tell you what… I don’t think that the guy at the desk saw any two girls move faster. I checked out and realized that the same guy was at the front desk. I almost told him about the unders, but left blushing…

We got back on the road and it made for a good conversation that morning. There would be a lull and then one of us would laugh and the other would know why and join. Then other times, one of us would shake our heads out of degust and the other would bust out laughing. We kept coming up with different theories of why we should not freak out about the stringy nasty thing…

Me- I mean the beds were made which means the sheets were most likely clean.

Sister- Well why didn’t the maids take the money.

Me- They might have missed it, I mean they missed the underwear too.

Sister- I can’t believe that I called JIm…

Me- Why would you think that they were his, wait I don’t want to know. ewww!

Sister- Oh, come on. I thought that it was a joke. Now he thinks that he needs to worry about what we are up too.

Me- Ha, hey when can we stop and get something to eat.

Sister- Let’s just wait til we get to Orlando.

Me- OK, I guess I can wait 4 hours…

The trip gets better but I think that I will wait and save that for another blog. Stay tuned


Thank goodness for Handicap Rails

This is a story from my normal rotation. It is from a work trip to LA.  I was able to tell it to the ladies at dinner on Wednesday night.  We were all laughing and having a great time, so the timing could have been what offset the humor of the story.  Someone asked Norma, my room mate for the training, how crazy was it to room with me.  She said fine…I  interrupted and said how well I had been behaving all week. (And really I was trying to calm it down for her, she was quiet).  She agreed, but then said that she would rather not room with someone who laughs at themselves while in the bathroom.  Of course this brought out a couple of giggles and some questioning faces. So anyone who knows me knows that I have to defend my character and explain… 

It started because on Monday night when we got to the hotel, they said that they did not have any rooms with two bed left.  We had just met each other and were very tired.  We did not want to share a bed, that night or actually any nights for that matter. So we said that would not work and after a lot of typing he found a room on “floor 2”.  Thats what he kept sayng “floor 2”, “floor 2” and kept asking if that was ok. How I am supost to know, he is the one that works there. So, we in return would ask why, what was special about floor 2?“.  After too many exchanges on this matter he finally told us that floor 2 was the Smoking Floor.  So we had a decision to make, smoking room or a pull out bed. 

We said that we would try the smoking floor…We get off the elevator and enter the thick smell of set-in tobacco smoke.  Me, being the optimist, said “We should go into the room first it will be better.”…I mean he did say that they clean the room very well after each guest…. Well we open the door and I was surprised that the room itself was not filled with smoke. As I entered the room I wasn’t sure if I needed to get on my hands and knees and calmly seek the nearest unblocked exit. People, it was pretty bad.  So we hadn’t even set our bags down when Norma started to sneeze.  I then said “Well this isnt going to work, I’m patient we’ll get this changed.” 

So down the stairs we went and to my great relief there was another at the counter.  She looked like she just might be able to help.  So Norma went to call her hubby and watched from afar.  I told the lady what had happened.  She, after typing for an exgaurated time period, said that there was a Handicap room on the third floor, and asked “Is that was alright?”  Again, how I am to know if that would be alright. Is that some sort of training response, like when you say “Thank You” at Chick fil a they have to say “My Pleasure”. I figured it would be alright, but asked her what was the difference.  She said that there were only a few differences but mainly there were more rails and some assistant items to assit the disabled.  I took it, that was easy. But while she was typing and doing what she had to do, I was still talking and moving my arms around. Of course, I wanted Norma to think that I was working hard to get us an upgrade. 

Well, we journeyed to our new room and I was a little worried, remember at this point I didnt know what training was going to be like and would have rather been at home.  Some of you know me and how my mind can get carried away.  I had envisioned the room and had the idea that the beds were the ones that tilt to meet you. That the walls would be covered by bars and everything would be lowered. 

The door opened and I cautiously walked in to find that it was normal.  Where were the wheel chair tracks?  OH and the smell, heavenly. Well as good as a hotel room can smell.  The only place that you could tell that the room was for the handicapped was in the bathroom. All along the walls and the bathtubs there were ton of rails and handlebars. It was crazy how many different angles and different placements these bars were.

Now at this point you may be wondering what the point of this story was or is.  Calm down I am getting there. Ok, so the room was nice and great. We had many laughs about the room mixups and I even made Norma go outside and ring the special doorbell so I would know what it did. If you are curious then I will let you know… the lights flashes and the ring was more of a pulsing tone.

Nothing special had happened until Wendesday morning when I was taking a shower.  As I went to get out I slipped,  time slowed down, but my mind raced…I just knew that I would be lying on the ground, dripping, naked-as-a-jaybird and unconscious. But in the moment I reached out and what did I find… You guessed it…   Handicap Rails!  I would have fallen if it weren’t for those beautiful handles that were in perfect spot.  As I grabbed the bar I thought  “Thank goodness for handicap rails”. And the truth is if it wasn’t for those rails, then I myself might have become handicapped!!!  As these thoughts went through my head, I found the humor and started laughing.  But I thought no more of this til later that night, when in front of everyone, my roommate calls me out!! She never said anything that morning. Why would someone so sweet do that to me?

That is one of my favorite travel stories but I have more where that came from. Including one from the same trip. It’s called Zig and Zag. Keep a look out. Who but me names their own stories?!